full life

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Last stupid post of the day, probably.

McSWEENEY'S
B R A I N
E X P L O D E R :
C E L E B R I T Y
" P H I L "
I N
T H E
B L A N K .

EDITED BY CARLTON DOBY

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The sentence "When she heard the good news, Jill picked up the phone ___________ brother" can be completed with the name "Ann Coulter," especially if you can say it out loud in a Philadelphia accent. Complete each of the following sentences with the name of a famous person.

1. Of all the Gibb Brothers, the artist ____________ often than he sketched Maurice.

2. "I can pay you in bricks or you can take your _____________."

3. Sign held on street median by down-on-his-luck metalworker: "______________ for food."

4. "You can either snag a petal, snatch a bud, _______________ for your pressed flower collection."

5. "Pots of ____________ made by boiling small cylinders with thine vegetables."

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Please note that this is a real quiz with real answers. Send your answers to carltondoby@hotmail.com before midnight July 26. The first five correct entrants will have their names announced here and will receive a McSweeney's Books title of our choosing.

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I've got 1, and I have a pretty good idea on 4, but I'm at a loss regarding the others.
#3 could be Will Weld. William Weld, former governor of Massachusetts, is now the ambassador to Canada.
Re: #3
(Anonymous)
smith

\Smith\, v. t. [AS. smi[eth]ian. See Smith, n.] To beat into shape; to forge. [Obs.] --Chaucer.

What smith that any [weapon] smitheth. --Piers Plowman.


Source: Webster's Revised Unabridged Dictionary, © 1996, 1998 MICRA, Inc.
Re: #3
(Anonymous)
In your defense, it's not a verb anyone actually uses.
It's either that or Orlando Jones, and I don't think there's a flower named Jones. Not that "lando" makes any sense there either. I suck at these.
(Anonymous)
1. Of all the Gibb Brothers, the artist _DREW BARRYMORE_ often than he sketched Maurice.

2. "I can pay you in bricks or you can take your _SHARON STONE_."

3. Sign held on street median by down-on-his-luck metalworker: "_WILL SMITH_ for food."

4. "You can either snag a petal, snatch a bud, _ORLANDO BLOOM_ for your pressed flower collection."

5. "Pots of _ROD STEWART_ made by boiling small cylinders with thine vegetables."